1. |
Sun Dogs
02:12
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I don't know where
My road is going
And I ain't too proud
Of where it's been
I hold court
And conversation
With myself,
My only friend
It seems depression
Has taught me lessons
And I can't wait for
This winter's end...
And those summer days when
Some blue-eyed girl
Made me hate myself
So goddamn much...
We've overdosed
On this South Shore
Coastal Blues
This life's a privilege
And in an instant
This rhythmic pulse we have
Might stop...
And yet I think
"I'm the man!"
But man I,
Wish I was
Somebody else...
"Somebody else?"
Anyone else...
Oh someone else,
Just not myself...
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2. |
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Good morning,
Right Into the spider's web
"Oh take good care, out there
Be aware, out there
My darling"
Good morning, light!
"Oh it burns through my open eyes
I can't take no more out there,
It's a war out there,
My darling!"
So you turn to dance away
And divest this madness
Then another summer goes,
And you start to think that...
"My whole life..."
-No!
"Yeah my whole life.."
-NO!
"Oh my God, my life's a failure!"
Big Failure, BIG FAILURE!
It's a rollercoaster that we ride on,
When there's no one to rely on,
Look to yourself to find a reason,
To feel as happy as while you're dreaming!
If the 'waves of change' are trying to drown you...
Everyone you know has moved on without you...
So? Smash the slate a find a new one!
And live that happy life you lived, once...
You're all alone,
Everyone else is pairing up
That 'big slow dance' is here,
The night's end is near...
Yeah, you're worried
Spent your life in school
Though you try, you're stuck in debt
"You've barely made a dent!"
20's came! And went-
You're worried...
"Don't you wanna get married, girl?
And raise a family?
Don't you want that picket fence?!"
And the pressure builds...
"ARE YOU EMPLOYED?"
no...
"No sir I ENJOY!"
This whole life you say is a,
'Failure'!
Big Failure, BIG FAILURE!
xx
When all alone is all,
You know...
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3. |
Red Day/Black Night
04:22
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I call this story,
"The Tale of Losing You"
A Dyno with pegs
Was meant for, two
Are you afraid of the dark
Or aren't you?
"Then meet me behind the
@#$% school...
A hundred snow days
Pushed the summer back through June
A Dyno with pegs was meant for two!
"You!"
I got this feeling that I'll never escape from...
(please don't leave me, darling)
"You!"
I try to hide, but I'm found by the light of...
"You!"
(please don't leave me, darling)
The hardest part, is I'm seeing myself in...
"You!"
(please don't...)
I need to leave you, darling!
I call this story,
"The Tale of Losing Hope"
And breathing the night through
Campfire, smoke
Among the pines
There's a sadness that fills the air
"A eulogy for the simple years"
A hundred snow days pushed the summer back through June
A dyno with pegs was meant for...
"Two"
x
"I don't wanna be
A post-traumatic fool
Staring at the ashes
Of all that we once knew,
When we come to gather
Upon Life's Eastern Shore
There, we all will find out
What comes after we're gone..."
"What comes after we're gone..."
After we're, gone.
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4. |
Marylou's Girl
04:19
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Sofa.
So?
So far so good!
So far...
Not sober
So?
I'm sociable,
And soulful!
"Didn't I say to take this slow,
Didn't I ever make this known?"
Drinks will last-
"Drinks will last when you drink alone,
Now look alive, cause you're looking very
Ghost..."
How could you rely on 'us'?
You couldn't rely on trust!
You trivialize, and you lust,
You live for July
Or bust!
I'll never live
By Hingham's coast
Oh no!
And I'll never get
A Marylou's
Girlfriend! "Didn't I say to take this slow,
Didn't I ever make this known?"
Drinks will last-
"Drinks will last when you drink alone,
Now look alive, cause you're looking very
Ghost..."
How could you rely on 'us'?
You couldn't rely on trust!
You trivialize, and you lust,
You live for July
Or bust...and summer has come now,
For all of us...
"Summer has come now! For all of us!"
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5. |
Baseball Dreams
02:27
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Pray for us
Atheist, pessimist
Everything's cancerous
Let's chain smoke away!
This is the
Seedy underbelly of,
This creature, 'us'
Lying on 'it's' back
Exposed, stargazing
Is it any wonder?
"Is it?"
Is it any wonder, how we have grown,
Accustomed to overdose,
In gas station bathrooms?
"I, for one, must stay in control!"
The habitual offenders credo!
"He had baseball dreams,
He could have made
Something of himself!"
Heart of mine,
Little hometown, of mine
Where 'Streets Are Lined'
With spent needles for
The kids
We will rob you blind!
Wedding rings, copper wire
As we scrap our lives
With our kids by our sides
Their baseball dreams,
Die...
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6. |
Ruth & Eddie
03:56
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I take one step back from the edge
And I'm living it down
"Around anyone else.."
Back and forth!
I'm, thinking of you
And it's freaking me out!
"Around anyone else..."
I take one step back from the edge
And sit down on her wall
Cigarettes, caffeine-free Diet Coke
Let the stories begin!
This sage of East Ave!
Spinning yarn after yarn!
She said "kids one day Ruth will be gone,
You must take care of her, cats"
As the thunderclouds grew...
I awoke that night,
Covered in ants
With her words in my head
Echoing through and through
She said...
"My, how the time flies by my eyes,
For once in my life, I wish the world would
Slow things down!''
Oh why do we try?
"Take my advice, don't rush to grow old
Your innocence is all you have!"
Back in those younger days,
It said 'No Fear' on my shirt,
But she knew I was filled with it,
She could tell how I hurt!
She said "kids when these days are gone
There's no getting them back"
And as god as my witness,
She knew for a fact!
And the story goes...
I retreat back into myself
And as John hurled that stone...
Came the death rattle moans
From the dog,
And the waves of advice
"That boy will land you in jai!"
Cue the side-burns police
"Hold the door!"
Now it's...'May we come in?..."
There's Jeanette on TV!
And she's bad mouthing me!
The whole town now thinks that
I kill cats
And I never planned to be a
Sociopathic creep! She said...
"My, how the time flies by my eyes,
For once in my life, I wish the world would
Slow things down!''
Oh why do we try?
"Take my advice, don't rush to grow old
Your innocence is all you have!"
Back in those younger days,
It said 'No Fear' on my shirt,
But she knew I was filled with it,
She could tell how I hurt!
She said "kids when these days are gone
There's no getting them back"
And as god as my witness,
She knew for a fact!
And the story goes...
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7. |
Hole In a Bowl Cut Head
03:27
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Help!
I can't stop bleeding,
Flows from my head!
And oh I,
Simply can't stop feeding
This self-hatred!
"Take two of these and
They'll control your breathing
Now calm down, boy!"
"Just quit your sobbing
With your lame 'first-world problems'
That privilege shows, boy!"
As I fled,
Through the woods that night
I felt my head, grow light
From venom, and song
A melody,
Seemed to call for me!
Somewhat mockingly
The forest said...
"We don't care about you,
No, we don't care!"
Help!
I can't stop eating,
Both of my hands
And this anxiety
Controls me!
How it demands!
"Commiserating, whilst self medicating?
But you say its 'your choice'!"
"Then blame everyone else,
With threats to kill yourself
But you won't, boy!
My exodus
Lumbered through the night
Where my appetite
Knelt to intense thirst
Sat riverside, to collect a drink,
I felt my heart sink,
The river cried...
"We don't care about you,
No, we don't care!"
I've reached my end,
On this mountain top
"Make these voices stop,
Sing songs of comfort"
Mountain replied...
"Neither you or I
Will ever know why
The whole world sings-
"We don't care about you,
No!
WE DON'T CARE..."
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8. |
Telepathic Lies
01:29
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I should have stayed awake,
But you left me while I was
Sleeping...
And as lucid as my dreams were,
I was not aware I was
Dreaming...
And you, remain
Undiscovered, and pure
Like an island off course
I'm discovering what,
Remains...
x
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9. |
Temper Tantrum
01:57
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When I awoke this morning
I could hear my freedom call
When I peered out my window
I could see the 'freeze' had gone...
I don't take the time to
Dwell on such rotten things,
I never lost that feeling
Feeling,
That feeling...
For once, could I just sleep alone?
I beg, and plead, for the sleep of stones
And now, she's gone
My Peace has grown
For he who loves himself,
Shall never be
Alone...
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10. |
High School Sweethearts
03:45
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I touched down in the city
My crimes in pursuit,
Of me
I left you drenched in self pity
And untying your shoes,
For me
I'll reinstate, reengage
Renegotiate my lease,
On life!
And honestly, I can say
"Nothings wrong with me!"
It's you, who's changing now...
Poor little boy,
I will see to your death!
I'm the Prom Queen, the Reason
Your life's such a shattered mess
'Destroyer of Worlds!'
I will swallow you whole
I will love you, and leave you
Then leave you a shell of yourself...
Now maybe I lost my mind,
Just as you 'found' yours too
One day you're ordained a Saint,
The next I'm Crowned the Fool
And they hang on your every word!
Then wanna see me hung by mine!
You say I'm a 'sinking ship'?
I offer you no life line!
I'll reinstate, reengage
Renegotiate my lease,
On life!
And honestly, I can say
"Nothings wrong with me!"
It's you, who's changing now...
I swear I've changed, and you're to blame!
Poor little boy,
I will see to your death!
I'm the Prom Queen, the Reason
Your life's such a shattered mess
'Destroyer of Worlds!'
I will swallow you whole
I will love you, and leave you
Then leave you a shell of yourself...
"Is your heart still bleeding?"
UH OH! OH NO!
"Are you still a demon bitch?"
OH YEAH! HELL YEAH!
"Tomorrow I'm leaving!"
UH OH! OH NO!
"SAY WHAT YOU'RE MEANING!"
OH NO! HELL NO!
"Stay the night, and then--
"I'LL LEAVE..."
"Promise me!"
Now, what the hell am I gonna do?
Cannot help be in love with you!
'88 through '92
I guess the years books coming true...
x
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11. |
Optimism Spin
03:14
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When our love,
Was a young one
I felt my heart
Explode at the seems
And then I felt...
'Nothing'
And our love is impossible
It can't maintain
Our vile tendencies
To always feel...
'Nothing'
"And you make them laugh"
"And you make them sing"
Together we have everything,
And yet we have...
'Nothing'
"So I'll end this codependency"
Tomorrow our hearts will be free!
And I'm sure we'll feel...
'Nothing'
Let's take time
To evaluate
Just where we stand
About 'everything'
Of a life filled with
'Nothing'
I'm gonna take time
To appreciate
This time alone,
Discovering myself
Amongst all this...
'Nothing'
"And you make them laugh"
"And you make them sing"
Together we have everything,
And yet we have...
'Nothing'
"So I'll end this codependency"
Tomorrow our hearts will be free!
And I'm sure we'll feel...
'Nothing'
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12. |
So Help Me Bob
03:27
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Oh life,
Spent living underground
And you came in,
Just a little bit too late...
Oh, God.
Oh me and my big mouth!
Now she knows I know
She knows that I'm insane...
Yeah.
Yeah, you know I'd love to take you home
"Just know I'll be gone tomorrow."
Yeah, but I don't wanna be alone!
"Then let me sew the seeds of sorrow."
Yeah, and after all the tears I've shown?
"I have a tissue you can borrow!"
Yeah, don't lead me,
Don't lead me...on
Oh I, just came for dollar-draughts!
But this salt-lined glass is,
Giving me the creeps
Oh, no, no, no
No I, I never should have came
And this existential crisis
Brings me down,
Down! Down! Down!
Yeah, you know I'd love to take you home
"Just know I'll be gone tomorrow."
Yeah, but I don't wanna be alone!
"Then let me sew the seeds of sorrow."
Yeah, and after all the tears I've shown?
"I have a tissue you can borrow!"
Yeah, don't lead me,
Don't lead me...on
Slow down!
We're in for a fight, can't even look at you
Without feeling tongue tied and angry
I'm tired, just wanna go to bed!
Can't even look at you without instantly wanting to...
Puke!
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13. |
'96 downburst
05:17
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The World's at war
And I'm caught in the middle...
No worse for wear, but I'm
Worn out
You use your words,
Like anti-aircraft fire
'And they bring me down'
But I...
Digress
You said yourself,
"You, you tend to panic,
Rushing to the doctor's for a
Bump on your head"
And I found myself,
In fear of my reflection
Gazing at the bubble before it bursts...
I love myself,
But hate what I'm becoming
A selfish prick
And paranoid
Oh won't someone
Say they believe me?
That I can change!
I want to change!
But I'm in my way...
You said yourself,
"You, you crave attention,
Rushing to the doctor's for a
Bump on your head!"
I caught myself,
In fear of my reflection
Glaring at the bubble before it bursts...
And I make things worse...
Before things get worse,
I'll make things right.
for Geraldine
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Ourselves On TV Whitman, Massachusetts
Ourselves On TV is Stephen Capachione Jr. He's a good egg if you get to know him.
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